On The Quilt

Today my husband and I are going on a date.  It isn't a costly one, but an outing that has become one of our favorites none the less.  We have a plan.  We are going to pack some snacks and water in our backpacks and head up the side of a mountain!  We have come to truly enjoy hiking.  But, as I think about it, I realize that what makes the outing so special is not only that we are breathing in the fresh air and enjoying the beauty of nature, it is because we get to spend that time alone with each other. 

Over the years I have learned that it is so important to continue to find ways to stay connected during each season of our marriage. When my husband and I had only been married a few years, and our children were young, there were times when the responsibilities of parenthood tried to out shadow our relationship with each other. You know those times… Toddlers and preschoolers running around the house always “underfoot”, play dates, and the constant busyness connected with caring for and loving our precious little ones. Don’t get me wrong, I loved those times and wouldn't trade my season as a mom of young ones for anything! But, I also remember longing for connection with my husband that didn't include holding a baby on my hip. Interestingly, it was during that time in our marriage that we didn't have access to baby sitters in order for us to even go on a date. However, not having a baby sitter or a lot of extra money shouldn't stop us from continuing to enjoy our husbands. I learned that a little creativity goes a long way toward deepening the bond in marriage.

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; 

and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God" (1 John 4:7).

It was a cold, rainy Saturday, when our children were 3 and 5, that my husband and I shared what to this day, remains one of our most favorite “dates”.  The kids had “rainy day” syndrome and were running around us in circles.  As Roy put it, “we needed a free-zone”.  I turned to him and said, “Let’s go on a picnic.”  And so we did.  He stoked up the fire and then went to the cupboard and pulled out a large quilt while I went into the kitchen and put together a quick lunch.  Then, together, we spread the quilt in front of our wood stove and laid the food on top.  The kids, who noticed our “strange” activity, were full of questions.  We let them know that “Mommy and Daddy were going on a date.”  They could play anywhere they wanted inside the house.  The only rule was that they couldn't touch or step on the quilt.  With that, we sat down and turned our attention to each other.  I must admit we were quite amused at our children’s reactions.  They quietly sat down only a few feet away and curiously watched us.  It actually was the first time they had been quiet all day!  But, as for our date, my husband and I enjoyed 45 minutes on that quilt, eating our lunch and talking about things other than our roles as parents.  The warmth from the wood stove added a cozy atmosphere and the humor of the situation increased our joy.    

"A cheerful heart is good medicine..." (Proverbs 17:22)

The lesson learned that day has carried us through many wonderful years together.  We learned that it doesn't matter if the money is tight or if there are no babysitters available.  We can always find ways to connect, one on one, with our spouses.  It is so important to foster that relationship and not allow it to drift simply because the demands of the day threaten to make us forget why we first fell in love.  All it takes is some creativity and resourcefulness.  God loves marriage and He wants us to succeed.  Our spouses are gifts to us and gifts that should be continually opened and enjoyed through each season of our lives.

“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Mark 10:9).

In His grip,

Linked with Spiritual Sundays, Titus 2 Tuesdays and Winsome Wednesdays

This week, I am the featured blogger on pastor, author and speaker Tamara Buchan's site, "Identity Crisis - Reclaim The True You" as she continues her series on our identity in Christ.  Please join me on Monday for the introduction and then on Thursday for my testimony as I share how my identity in Christ was truly born. 

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