A few days ago I began a series on marriage in order to share the hope that God offers for our relationships.  I posted a list of the “Do’s and Don’ts I’ve Learned” which you can read by clicking here.  I am still learning new things every day, as God is faithful to teach!  When I shared with my husband that I was writing this series on marriage and about the things that God has taught me over the years, he was excited to get on board!  He wrote a list of his own and asked if I would post it on my blog for the guys out there and I readily agreed! 

I am so pleased to share my husband’s list of things that he has learned in marriage.  I think it is important, as women, to know and understand things from our spouses’ perspective.  When I read his list, I was deeply touched.  And so, it is a blessing to introduce my husband, Roy, as my guest writer today.  As he shares his thoughts in the post below, and as I continue this series, we pray that our words bring hope and encouragement to each of you. 

  • Do put God first in everything you do.  There is no better way to honor your wife. (Matthew 22:37)
  • Do pray with your wife.  It strengthens your relationship and it strengthens your requests to God.  (Matthew 18:19)
  • Don’t talk down, belittle or joke about your wife to others through “teasing” or just “having fun”.  (Proverbs 11:12)
  • Do honor marriage.  I never understood it when people hear someone is getting married and they say things like, “Oh, sorry!  Life is over now!”  Or make “ball and chain” comments.  Marriage is a gift to be cherished and honored.  I tell them it is the best way to enjoy and live life!  (Genesis 2:22-23)
  • Do listen to your wife!  What she has to say is important.  (James 1:19)
  • Don’t just schedule your wife in.  Make time with her priority.  She’s not an event.  She is God’s gift to you.  She’s your life.  (Ephesians 5:25)
  • Do tell your wife you love her every day!  I like to tell mine several times a day…It grows love.  (Proverbs 31:28-29)
  • Don’t exclude your wife.  Invite her into communication, sports, hobbies, any activity.  My wife is my best friend.  (Ecclesiastes 9:9)
  • Do date your wife.  Try to surprise her with the unexpected.  When I told my wife I wanted to take a cooking class with her, she was putty in my arms!  J  (Proverbs 5:18)
  • Do be a man of integrity -- Nothing looks better on you.  (Titus 2:7-8)
  • Do give everything of yourself to your wife.  She was chosen for you by God, so why wouldn’t you?  (1 John 3:16)
  • Don’t be quick to overreact.  (Maybe I should say that one a couple more times, just for my sake!  Lol)  Love is patient.  (1 Corinthians 13:4)
  • Do love her with all your heart.  Remember the love of your first meeting.  Fan the flame of love that will endure a lifetime.  (Ephesians 5:25)
  • Do be silly.  Silly is fun, disarming and playful which builds a rich life.  (2 Samuel 6:14)
  • Do encourage your wife.  It’s amazing the light that can shine from a single word of encouragement from a husband.  (Matthew 5:16)
  • Don’t discourage your wife.  Yep guys, discouragement is a big one we tend to do especially if we want our own way…I’m talking from experience.  A victory from discouragement is always sour.  (Ephesians 4:29)
  • Do help around the house.  Don’t think those excuses running through your head are real:  “I work hard, I’m the bread winner, and she loves doing all that stuff!”  Help out.  She’ll love it and her appreciation is good for the soul!  (Ecclesiastes 4:10)
  • Do find ways to have adventure in your marriage.  Take up hiking, go bowling, or any activity where you can have fun together.  (Ecclesiastes 9:9)
  • Do be honest!  Be honest with a loving, discerning heart that uplifts.  (Job 27:4)
  • Do be faithful.  (Matthew 25:27-28)
  • Do apologize immediately when you are wrong.  Time is your enemy.  (Ephesians 4:26-27)
  • Don’t hold a grudge.  It only hurts you.  (Ephesians 4:31-32)
  • Do forgive -- completely release to God any feeling of being wronged.  Forgive as the Lord has forgiven you.  (Colossians 3:13)
  • Don’t judge.  When you judge your wife, you place yourself above her…and that makes for a farther fall.  (Matthew 7:1-5)
  • Do hold each other accountable.  In love correct.  Show accountability by example.  (James 5:16)
  • Do be a gentleman, starting with your wife.  There is no greater example for your children. (1 Peter 3:7)
  • Do remember your wife’s birthday and anniversary.  Come on guys, we have computers, calendars and iPhones to help us!  (Titus 1:8)
  • Do be humble.  God has placed you as the head of your household.  Place your wife and family’s needs before your own.  (Colossians 3:12)

I am so thankful that God has placed this man in my life!  Our journey is such a blessing!  Please join me this coming Monday as I continue this series on thriving in our marriages.  I pray you will be encouraged!

Together with Christ,

Linked with:

Thought Provoking Thursday
Scattering The Stones' Thankful Thursday
Spiritual Sundays


  1. thanks for sharing these. God bless your marriage more.

  2. oopps, sorry... my site is http://www.piasjournal.com

  3. Thank you, Pia! Blessings to you as well!

  4. Ok, so I'm so printing this one out for my husband, lol. Seriously, Joan and Roy, I look forward to all you guys are sharing with us. Marriage is such a precious and fragile relationship! Every bit of Godly advice is welcome and needed! God bless,

  5. lol...I'm sure your husband will love that! :-) Roy and I are praying that as we share the lessons we have learned and the things that God has taught us, others will be encouraged and find hope for their own marriages! Blessings, Tracy! In Him, Joan

  6. Dear Joan and Roy,

    That was absolutely beautiful, touching, and yes, challenging but in a wonderful way. I am so grateful for the two of you and your willingness to be vulnerable so that others may gain wisdom. Can't wait to see more from the two of you!


  7. Thank you, Lisa! I'll be sure to share your encouraging comment with Roy! God has shown us so much and we are blessed to share!

    In His Grip, Joan

  8. Wow! What a great list! You are blessed!

  9. Thanks, Esther! You are so right...Roy is a true gift from God to me! We've been through so much and as a result, God has drawn us even closer to each other! Thank you for stopping by! In Him, Joan

  10. Charlotte DitmoreNovember 02, 2012

    Excellent suggestions. I wish all men would follow this example.


  11. Thank you, Charlotte. Yes, "Iron sharpens iron". We can all learn from each other, can't we? Blessings, Joan

  12. Thank your husband for writing this. I'm going to print this out for when we counsel couples. It's awesome to have all the scriptures, too.

  13. I will definitely let him know! Thank you for your encouragement and blessings to you as you serve Him by coming alongside other couples!


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